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Showing posts from August, 2009

Follow the simple principles of my spiritual program, and you too can have a "Mind Like Cheese" (tm).

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Had the entire Google database implanted in my brain. I know everything now, although a lot of it is wrong or urban legend. So...no change.

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Just created a social network for anti-social people. It was easy: there's no website, so you can't join. But I still charge a small fee.

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I don't have any trouble multi-tasking, because I order tasks sequentially, not synchronously. (You're welcome.)

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Today I'm working remotely, NOT remotely working.

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Nothing in this world is so lost as email in my inbox more than two days old.

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I like the Kindle, but it's too expensive to buy an ebook reader each time I want to read a book. I'll just get the paperback, thank you.

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I heard the Scottish Justice Minister has released Bernie Madoff from prison on compassionate grounds.

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Capri pants for men: Should they be illegal in the United States?

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I don't think I could ever be as excited about media personality Wendy Williams as she is.

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NYC

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Planning on your part does not constitute a non-emergency on my part.

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I won't let an efficient idea go to waste and have created a Death Panel at the office to monitor my staff.

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Just a very quick update that -- wait, never mind. It's too late now. The moment is gone. As you were.

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The Time-Traveller's Wife -- best scam ever?

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Want to withdraw from friends, family, and society? The iPhone has an app for that!

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Oh no, the Democrats are now convening Zombie Panels!!

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Let's be positive and convene Life Panels!

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Wi-Fi on the beach - is it good or bad? Discuss.

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Why would anyone buy a Mercedes jeep (unless it's "because I can")?

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Why would anyone would buy a Mercedes jeep (unless it's "because I can")?

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Seriously, why would texting and driving "need more study"?

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Texting and driv-- aaaiiiieeeeeeee!

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Obama wasn't born in the United states. He was born in Hawaii, which apparently is a separate country.

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Apparently, ID'ing someone, cuffing them, and then having a beer afterwards is a lot more common than realized.

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